This was taken from her book this year. I Hate Everyone. . .Starting with Me. When I die (and yes, Melissa, that day will come; and yes, Melissa, everything’s in your name), I want my funeral to be a huge showbiz affair with lights, cameras, action. . . .I want craft services, I want paparazzi and I want publicists making a scene! I want it to be Hollywood all the way. I don’t want some rabbi rambling on; I want Meryl Streep crying, in five different accents. I don’t want a eulogy; I want Bobby Vinton to pick up my head and sing “Mr. Lonely.” I want to look gorgeous, better dead than I do alive. I want to be buried in a Valentino gown and I want Harry Winston to make me a toe tag. And I want a wind machine so that even in the casket my hair is blowing just like Beyoncé’s.

Entire Thread

Topic	Date Posted	Posted By
Joan Rivers	04/09/14 22:30:00	Susan Jacques
Re:Joan Rivers	04/09/14 22:33:00	Michael Brown
Re:Re:Joan Rivers	04/09/14 23:02:00	bobby osborne
Re:Re:Re:Joan Rivers	05/09/14 00:01:00	Keith Iddon
Re:Re:Re:Re:Joan Rivers	05/09/14 00:13:00	Georgina Flint
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Joan Rivers	05/09/14 00:18:00	Keith Iddon
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Joan Rivers	05/09/14 00:19:00	Georgina Flint
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Joan Rivers	05/09/14 00:27:00	Keith Iddon
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Joan Rivers	05/09/14 12:57:00	Julian Pavey
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Joan Rivers	05/09/14 13:03:00	Georgina Flint
Joan Rivers - best 80 remarks	05/09/14 16:58:00	Carol Burge
Re:Joan Rivers - best 80 remarks	07/09/14 15:45:00	Terry Coyne

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